There’s Nothing Wrong with You Even When You’re Overwhelmed

When it comes to overwhelm, one of the strongest beliefs I hear, from clients, students and people in my Insight Timer sessions, is this:

“If I’m overwhelmed, there must be something wrong with me.”

And if you're someone who identifies as a high achiever or high performer, this can feel even more true. There’s often this internalised idea that if you can’t manage everything, all the time then you’re somehow failing.

You’re supposed to be able to handle it all.

Stay calm.

Stay capable.

Stay in control.

And when overwhelm hits, the inner critic doesn’t miss a beat. It jumps in immediately with,

“Why can’t you cope?

What’s wrong with you?

Everyone else seems to be on top of it all. Why aren’t you?”

But here’s something I want to offer you gently, and from experience:

Overwhelm is not a sign that something’s wrong with you.

It’s a signal from your system.

And what it’s often pointing to… is thought. Not the things on your to-do list themselves, but your thinking about those things and especially the thoughts that say you’re behind, you’re failing, you should be doing more.

Watch out for that word should. The inner critic loves it. It tells us we should be more productive. More pleasant. More perfect. More “on top of things.” And when we’re not, or when we simply can’t be, that’s when overwhelm kicks in. Not because something’s broken, but because your body is responding perfectly to a mental load that’s become too heavy to hold.

It’s saying:

“I can’t carry this much thought right now.”

And that’s not a flaw. That’s wisdom.

The Habit of Fixing vs. the Power of Feeling

When we feel overwhelmed, the natural reflex is to try to get rid of it. We inherently want to fix it, solve it, push it away. For me, that used to look like doing more. I’d try to tick things off the list as fast as possible, thinking that if I could just finish everything, the feeling would lift.

But it didn’t. In fact, it only made the noise louder. My body became more stressed, my mind more tangled, and the inner critic more persistent.

And that’s the trap: we try to escape the overwhelm by becoming busier. We override the body’s wisdom. We ignore the emotional cues asking us to pause, to soften, to be still. Instead, we push harder.

Stillness starts to feel unsafe. Like if we stop, everything might fall apart. But what if stillness wasn’t dangerous? What if it was actually where clarity and ease live?

You Don’t Have to Earn Your Rest

Many of us, especially those who’ve lived in high-functioning modes for a long time, have learned this:

You can rest after you’ve done everything.

You can pause once it’s all finished.

You can relax when you’ve earned it.

I lived like that for years. I couldn’t even sit still on the sofa and watch TV without the buzzing thought that there was something I should be doing instead - marking, emailing, catching up.

But the truth is:

You don’t have to earn your stillness.

You don’t need to do more in order to be allowed to do less.

Overwhelm isn’t something you overcome by achieving more. It’s something that starts to soften when you allow yourself to pause, before you’ve finished the list. When you begin to relate to yourself differently, and let the moment be enough.

What If Overwhelm Is a Messenger, Not a Mistake?

I often talk about the tight chest, the racing thoughts and the fogginess of overwhelm and how we instinctively want to get rid of it. But what if these sensations were messengers? What if your body, in those moments, is speaking your wisdom aloud?

When we learn to sit with these feelings, not to solve them, but to be with them, something shifts.

This is what I mean when I talk about learning to be with yourself.

Not as a project.

Not as a problem to fix.

But as a presence to meet yourself exactly as you are.

You don’t need a new tool or productivity system. You don’t need to eliminate overwhelm.

What if you welcomed it in? Just enough to notice… what it might be asking of you?

Maybe it’s saying:

Pause.

Breathe.

Feel your feet on the floor.

Place a hand on your chest or belly and ask,

Can this moment be enough? Can I be enough, just as I am?

The Gift in the Feeling

The body doesn’t lie. And it doesn’t abandon us.

When you feel overwhelmed, what if, instead of seeing it as something wrong, you saw it as your inner wisdom surfacing?

Because that’s what I truly believe:

Overwhelm, when met gently, becomes an invitation.

An invitation to reconnect.

To come back to yourself.

To stop overriding your needs and start trusting your nervous system again.

Not by thinking your way out.

But by feeling your way in.

So, if you’re feeling overwhelmed today, please hear this:

You are not broken.

There’s nothing wrong with you.

You are not failing.

You’re just finally feeling.

And that’s where the freedom begins.

If this resonated with you, and you're ready to explore a softer, more sustainable way to be with yourself, even in the midst of overwhelm, I’d love to invite you into a conversation.

You’re welcome to book a free clarity call, where we can gently explore where you are, what you’re carrying, and what might open up when you no longer see yourself as something to fix.

No pressure. Just presence.

You can book that call right here

I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.